Even though the questions and examples in the book are ones that women can relate to much better than men, they still gave me much to think about. After all, for every issue that women struggle with in marriage, there is usually a similar or opposing issue that men struggle with at the same time. They are usually vastly different, but they are there. Marriages don’t usually fall apart because only one person has problems. If there was anything this book reminded me of, it was that i am not the only one carrying burdens in my marriage.

Here is the official summary of the book:

Women everywhere wonder if there is more to marriage than what they have. Best-Selling author Linda Dillow, helps women shape their marriage by design rather than letting circumstances shape it by default. What’s It Like to Be Married to Me? And Other Dangerous Questions, is a book about knowing the difference between having a desire for a better marriage and setting the goal of having a better marriage—as women look in the mirror to see how they can change. Extremely intimate and honest, Dillow shares the best and worst things she has done in her nearly fifty years of marriage, guides women to make their own Marriage Purpose Statement, and leads them into God’s heart for what their marriage could be.

Author bio:

Linda Dillow is no stranger to publishing and adventure. She’s the author of Creative Counterpart, Calm My Anxious Heart, The Blessings Book, Satisfy My Thirsty Soul, and co-author of the Best-Selling book Intimate Issues. Linda and her husband Jody lived in Europe and Asia for 17 years training Christian leaders in closed countries with Biblical Education by Extension, during this time, Linda traveled extensively in Romania, Russia, Hungary, Poland and Asia. She taught women and helped them launch women’s ministries. She is a mother of four children, as well as a grandmother.

(a few of) My thoughts:

I thought the book was great. It was very insightful, open and honest. Linda Dillow didn’t seem to skirt any issues or pull any punches. As far as i could tell her advice and insight was right on the money.

Obviously, I’m not a woman. That being the case, i was at first tempted to read something and think “Yes! I wish my wife would act that way.” Or, “that’s right, women should be asking themselves that question!” It didn’t take long for me to realize however, that I needed to be examining my own life and marriage in the same way Linda was encouraging women to examine theirs. I realized that if we as husbands would simply love our wives the way that Jesus commanded, our wives would not be dealing with many of these issues. In that sense, the book almost seemed unfair. Women should not be the ones who are doing all the work. Men and women should both be taking responsibility to make their marriages all they were meant to be. For me, the bottom line was this: If my wife is willing to take these sort of steps, and ask these sort of questions of herself in order to grow her love for me, it would be nothing short of sinful for me not to do the same.

This book inspired me to work harder to become intentional in my marriage and to stop leaving it to chance and circumstance. I highly recommend it…not just for women, but for any man who is willing to do anything it takes to advance his relationship with his wife to the next level!

My review copy was provided by Coast to Coast Publicity, and they included a second copy for me to give away. If you are interested in this book, email me with your name and address. I’ll pick a name at random next week and mail out the book!

Otherwise, if you’d prefer to purchase a copy (and i really think you should) You can purchase it at Amazon.

I just wanted to point you toward a new book that i’m thoroughly enjoying right now. It’s called “The Last Christian,” and although i’m only a little more than halfway done (i’m a slow reader, and this one is giving me a lot to think about) i can already recommend it. While i would normally hold a recommendation until i’ve completed a book, this one, while fiction, has given me a lot to chew on from a Christian perspective. This is one of those books that i’m really looking forward to discussing with friends when i’ve finished it. I especially recommend this one for fans of sci-fi–specifically near-future (think The Hunger Games, City of Ember, or the movie Gamer)

Here’s a recap from the publisher:

A.D. 2088.

As Abby navigates a society grown more addicted to stimulating the body than nurturing the soul, she and Creighton Daniels, a historian troubled by his father’s unexpected death, become unwitting targets of powerful men who will stop at nothing to further their nefarious goals. Hanging in the balance—the spiritual future of all humanity.

Click Here to see more information!

And now, just the obligatory disclaimer: This book was provided for review by the WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group

I’m the kind of man who holds on tight
To the memory of what I’ve done
Every restless day and sleepless night
It’s in my head just like a movie
That I’m watching from the drive-in of my life

‘Cause my mind knows Your mercy is enough
But my heart wants to deserve it

I need You to forgive me
For forgetting You forgive me
I need You to remind me
That Your grace is big enough to save me

I’m living proof that Love is blind
In my weakness You gave everything
And though unrestrained I am confined
As I’m building up this prison
And I’m swallowing the key while I’m inside

These bars are made of nothing but my pride
And I need you even more than when
You set me free the first time

I need You to forgive me
For forgetting You forgive me
I need You to remind me
That Your grace is big enough to save me
From my past and forgive me for my future
You can save me from myself
And forgive me when I hurt You
You can save me from my freedom
And forgive me when I trade it for a chain

While this is exciting news in it’s own right, even more exciting is the fact that (at least for now) Centricity has put the entire album up for preview in an online jukebox! That’s right…you can check it out in it’s entirety for free! Click here to give it a listen!

As you probably know, Andrew has been my favorite songwriter for many years. As much as i’ve loved each and every record he’s done, this one is probably the best (i’ve only listened through it twice, but my first impressions are strong!).

Don’t miss the chance to preview the record…and please, support it when it’s released! As a culture we can’t afford to let music like this be overlooked and under-supported.

While i’m on the topic of good music, all of you should head over to www.noisetrade.com and check it out. It’s an amazing concept started in part by Derek Webb and some friends. Basically, over 60 artists (and the list grows every day) have put music online (many entire records) that you can download by one of two options: 1.) you can give three email addresses of friends that you think might like the songs, or 2.) you can pay whatever price you like. It’s the future of music in my opinion–and that’s a good thing!

So head over there. Several artists you should look for (and remember, you can get the albums for FREE!) are Derek Webb, Sandra McCracken, Jill Phillips, and Andy Gullahorn (who’s (free) album ‘reinventing the wheel’ is probably is on my top 5, and who was one of the producers of Andrew Peterson’s new album).

Don’t pass it up, and check back often. New albums are added all the time!

The song is loosely based around the communion table–being that i wrote it for communion Sunday. Other than communion, there were two things that i really wanted to write into the song. One was a clear gospel presentation, and one was the idea of setting up reminders (to ourselves) of the things God has done for us. We see this concept in many places in the Old Testament (specifically Deuteronomy and Joshua) where God commanded the people to place stones and markers–both so that they would remember, but also so that their children would be curious and ask their parents what the symbols meant.

I tried a couple of new things as i was writing this song. One of them is the lyrical repetition. Generally, i try to stay away from that sort of thing when i’m writing. But in this song i really felt like repetition would be a good thing…after all, what is God if He isn’t repetitive in His mercy toward us? On the musical side i ventured into some new territory and played my acoustic guitar with some heavy delay, which is pretty unusual for me. I liked the way it turned out, although i was playing with trembling hands!

Here are the lyrics, and you can listen to the song buy clicking on the play button at the bottom of the post. I’d be happy to know what y’all think.

Remember

Father Mother, set a marker
So we will not forget the past
Tell your children what God has done
When they come to ask

As you look upon this altar
Remember that He gave all that He had
As you gather at this table
The bread and wine are whispering the fact
That He loves us to the last

(chorus)
Jesus bent His ear to hear us
And came here to restore us to the life
The life that He meant for us
I sing in honor of our Merciful King
And to tell of every merciful mercy

Each one broken, just a token
Of who you and I were meant to be
He was wounded for His kindred
He was bruised for you and me

As you look upon this altar
Remember that His blood paid every cost
As we gather at this table
The bread and wine are whispering the cross
That He traded for the lost

(bridge)
Amazing grace how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch, that saved a wretch like me
Amazing love how could it be
That a King would come and bleed for me

Imagine this: All the hillarious, gut-busting b-movie commentary of Mystery Science Theater 3000 applied to dozens of the movies we all know and love…movies like the Matrix, the Lord of the Rings trilogy, the recent Star Wars trilogy, and even popular TV shows like Grey’s Anatomy. Of course, there’s plenty of b-movies as well.

I know what i’m bringing to the next movie night!